Monday, April 30, 2012

MOTIVATIONAL MONDAY: Plug into your Marriage


This Motivational Monday, I would like to motivate you to...

Unplug So You Can Plug Into Your Marriage

by in Communication
In the information age it seems there’s no end to devices to help us stay connected. There are all sorts of mp3 players, tablets, laptops, desktops, gaming consoles and other devices that help keep us informed of the latest and greatest in the world and they’re all becoming increasingly more available and more portable.

These devices are great and even help you keep in touch with people who are important to you such as friends, relatives and even your spouse and children. But too often, these devices can actually hinder your relationship with those who are important to you. Below are some tips to help you unplug so you can plug into your most important relationship: your marriage.

Decompress with your spouse . . .

. . . instead of with your device. Oftentimes, people use being plugged in is a way to decompress after a long or challenging day. There’s something relieving about logging in and looking up friends, listening to music or checking out your favorite blogs. But this is a great time to connect with your spouse instead of connecting with your device.
Marriages become strengthened when spouses hear each others’ difficulties (like after having a challenging day) and are able to hear and console each other. This shows each other care and affection and creates love and connection between each other.

So next time you want to put your feet up after a challenging day go sit down by your spouse to put your feet up and tell them all about what made your day so challenging. Spouses are usually a lot more consoling than a screen anyway.

Instead of texting, try calling

Sending texts to your spouse throughout the day is great. It shows your spouse that you’re thinking about them and that you want to keep them included in your day even if they’re not around. But there’s something extra special about calling your spouse instead of sending a text.

Think of it like way back when you were dating and you used to call each other just to say hi and talk. You may not have had a whole lot to talk about (if there were text messages back then, a simple text would have done) but somehow you were always able to make a conversation out of it, anyway.

Even if a simple text message will do, give your spouse a call during their lunch break and see where it goes. You might be surprised how much you’re able to talk about (and how long you’re able to talk about it).

Instead of going online, go out

The simple act of getting out requires that you get out of your home and away from your devices (at least most of them). You don’t have to go anywhere fancy, expensive, or anywhere that costs at all for that matter, but the simple act of getting out means you have to communicate with your spouse in order to make plans, find a sitter, etc.
Even if all you do is go out for a picnic dinner or go to a scenic view and talk this is all time that is wholly devoted to your spouse and is not interrupted by websites, updates, etc. Remember spending money is not the object of going out, the act of spending unadulterated time with your spouse is.

Fundamentally, being plugged in is a solitary exercise. You only need yourself to be able to do it. This means that when you’re plugged in you’re not wholly plugged in with your spouse…even if you are in the same room. There’s something extra that happens in a marriage when a couple sits down and engages with each other during a game of cards or eating ice cream at the dinner table after the kids have gone to bed.
Being plugged in often makes you unavailable and you miss the moments that are occurring around you. Think of it. At the end of the day, you’ll still be able to log in and find out what news headlines or status updates you missed, but you’ll never be able to go back to a moment that you missed with your spouse.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Wordless Wednesday


Monday, April 23, 2012

MOTIVATIONAL MONDAY: What God has brought together...


This weekend I attended one of our RWOC's Sisters wedding ceremony, and it reminded me of Gods words, What God has brought together let no man put asunder...

It motivated me, it reminded me that God made this union, and our union is strong, its correct, its no mistake.  I'm going to shout my love to my husband, my appreciation for him, my disappointments to him, my highs, and my lows to him, my admiration to him.   I'm going to communicate to him, and I'm going to always give him something that only HE can feel.  Therefor, what God have joined together let no man, no thing, no one put asunder!

Congratulations Sista Ashanda!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Wordless Wednesday


Tuesday, April 17, 2012

HOT TOPIC TUESDAY: Letting him be a man...


Personally, I think I work a whole lot more than my husband.  I feel that he brings home the bacon, but I make ends meet.  What I mean by that is, not only do I bring in the money that is much needed sometimes, I also am with our son more, I run errands more, and do things around the house that are needed more, as well as I do all the bookkeeping for us and my business, and more!  Some days I am exhausted, but in order to avoid conflict I have to keep the communication going, and sometimes I admit that I can make him feel like he's not doing enough, like he is not the man. 

If you're a woman with many hats, how can you wear the hat of letting hubby be a man at all times? 

Monday, April 16, 2012

MOTIVATIONAL MONDAY: YOU are in control of your own mood...


I thought this article would me a great motivation to the wives.  Enjoy and put it to use...

Master Your Attitude: Bolster Your Confidence to Stay Sexy for Your Spouse

by in Relationship
You are in control of your own mood. I’ll say it again: YOU are in control of YOUR own mood. This is probably the most important piece of advice I give to people, regardless of where they are in their relationships.

What this means, is that no matter what is happening in your day to day life, no matter what your workday was like or how your back feels, no matter what errands you have to run or how much you have to spend to fix the car, no one is responsible for your happiness but you. If you CHOOSE to be angry or upset about your daily stresses, then you will wallow in your bad mood, and it’s nobody’s fault but your own.

We can’t rely on others to make us feel good – they have themselves to worry about.
It’s easy to let the stresses of the day (or week, month, etc.) to pile up. It’s easy to submit to feelings of anger and depression, to feel sorry for yourself, and let it affect the way you deal with the people around you.

How does your mood affect your spouse?
Take a moment to think outside of yourself. If you’re in a bad mood, how does that affect the way you communicate with your spouse? If you are short with them, or seem distant, disinterested, or on edge, how will that affect any attempt at communication? Plenty of arguments are the result of outside stressors, not the issue being argued. By allowing yourself to wallow in a bad mood, you set the stage for increased stress and MORE trouble. This only gets worse when both halves of a couple let themselves settle into a negative attitude.

Now, what about the opposite effect? Imagine your home life if you and your spouse were excited to see each other everyday, if you could laugh about a stressful situation at work, or combine forces to solve problems around the house. In the bedroom, a playful, positive attitude goes a LONG way. Confidence is sexy, and unhappiness is definitely NOT a way to gain confidence. Choosing to be in a good mood will improve your outlook on the world around you, and with it, your self-confidence.

But how, you ask? How can you take control of your moods?

The short answer is to simply make yourself be happy. Stack the odds in your favor. This is an entirely personal endeavor. Take the necessary steps to improve your own life, and it will improve your marriage, your job, your family, everything. Evaluate the stressors in your life, and deal with them accordingly. Make an effort to get off the couch. Learn something new or rekindle the passion for an old hobby. If there’s something you want to accomplish, today’s the day to start!

A positive outlook will be infinitely beneficial to your marriage, from your sex life to taking care of the kids. When you feel good about what you’re doing, you will feel good about yourself – and when you feel good about yourself, your partner will feel good about you too!

Just as negativity breeds more negativity, happiness results in, you guessed it, MORE HAPPINESS. Good days turn into good weeks, good weeks into good months, and so on. Only you are in control of your mood. If you desire self-improvement, go for it, as long as it makes you happy! When you and your spouse both take control of your own happiness, you will find each other much more pleasant to be around, and a whole lot more attractive.

The online Article

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Wordless Wednesday


Tuesday, April 10, 2012

HOT TOPIC TUESDAY: I love me some him!


Husbands all over the world make the world go round, and today we want to know what do you love about that man of yours!

I love my..........

Monday, April 9, 2012



Yes, we live for our husband, we live for our kids, we love our jobs, etc., but what is all of this if we don't live for us?  Our kids are our motivators, our husbands are great motivators, our careers motivate us for many reasons, but its you thats your biggest motivator.  Its you that needs to take care of you.  Its you that inspires the ones around you.  Its you that needs to love you, everything else is just great additions to you...

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Wordless Wednesday


Tuesday, April 3, 2012

HOT TOPIC TUESDAY: Shacking up... Hey or Ney


Do you think its ok to live with your partner before marriage?  If so, why, if not, why.

Monday, April 2, 2012



Yes, Thanksgiving is months away, but we should be thankful everyday!  Thankful that we're here on earth, thankful that we're breathing, thankful that we have roofs over our heads, thankful that we have a partner to grow old with, even if they get on our nerves sometimes.  This motivational Monday I will like to motivate you to just give thanks today!

Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more.
If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.
- Oprah Winfrey