Tuesday, August 2, 2011

HOT TOPIC TUESDAY: Handling Anger

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This hot topic Tuesday I would like to borrow the words of marriage expert, Dr. Gary Chapman.

What do you do when you feel angry toward your spouse?

The reality of anger. Everyone gets angry when they sense that they have been wronged.

The first step is to: acknowledge   The second step is to: admit your anger to each other. Tell your spouse that you are angry and why you are angry.
Today, I want to share the third step: Agree that verbal or physical explosions are not appropriate responses to anger. Such behavior should not be accepted as normal.
One practical way to break this negative practice of explosion is to agree that whenever either of you begins to explode, the other will walk out of the room, and if you are followed, you will walk out of the house. If the spouse pursues you in the yard with yelling and screaming, you will run to a neighbor's house. If you both agree to this strategy, then each of you will know that when the other starts walking or running, it's time to stop and reflect on what is happening.
Learn to say, "I'm sorry. My exploding at you was wrong. I guess I was so hurt and angry I lost control. I'm sorry. Please forgive me." Now you are ready to discuss the issues.

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